spent the weekend in flagstaff with seven other people in a cabin and now i hate them all except for three. well, i was never that enchanted by the rest of them anyways. one night i was so frustrated i slept in my car wrapped up like a cocooned caterpillar in t's sleeping bag and my (used-to-be) white hoodie. and the night before that i was just as much a mess but instead of being raged i was apathetic and crying and trying to get t to let go of me so i could drive home alone for 3 hours in the middle of the night, not that i would have been able to drive i am not enchanting or delightful or inspiring or interesting or lovely okay. i am a mask. i'm going to have a new scar from a moment of weakness over something so stupid it makes me want to puke and i'm just disgusted with myself, again. side note i do not get along with girls, at all. i spent the entire weekend avoiding the two girls that were there because i literally cannot be around them. so i am predisposed to dislik
