so if you couldn't tell (i don't really expect you to be able to) i've been slipping backwards, supposedly "pretty badly" but i never think anything is bad enough. my mom called my old trainer in colorado and asked her to look for a buyer for lenardo. if they get rid of my horse i will literally have no reason not to starve myself to death. just sayin my hair isn't that disgusting anymore i promise my friend keeps texting me and i'm too tired to reply. no i don't really want to hang out on sunday. hey this is so familiar, it's amazing how easy it is to fall back into this bullshit. i'm not really seeing what i'm typing the world is kind of far away and the screen is just a hallucination, there's something pushing on my eyes from inside my head and i have a headache you blink once and the ghosts are back and your skin is just paper stretched across bone, the things i want i can't hold
so i'm in my computer class and it's almost over and i'll never see these faces again. i have a 93.43% but i don't know how because normally i am the Ultimate Procrastinator. technically i could leave right now but i am just so comfortable and my fingers are kind of just going going going and i'm not goig to use the backspace buttion. i wihs wish i could show my facde. face, facade, both i guess. i lied about not using the backspace butto n because i am tired and it's hard to type with craaaazy nails anmd this keyboard STINKS. i hate the taste of alcohol i just do. i feel like i'm swallowing nail polish remover. i should go up to flag and stay with my friend V and get drunk on her vodka mix that tastes like vanilla cupcakes. the other night in the back of my car i was wearing th e infamous red sofees and i was with you and i took a sip of that awful brandy which wqas old and had been sitting in your friend's cabinet and i made funny faces because3 it bur...